The First New Chapter

Who Am I?  

Well I am a 35 year old woman who just found herself ousted out of a 7 year relationship she thought was going to be a lifetime.  I am feisty, creative, and positive I will be fine.  But right now, it feels like hell.  This is my tale of how I will survive and move on.

Who Was He?

He was my best friend of 7 years before we started a romantic relationship and I moved in with him.  We were an awesome duo who could accomplish anything when we were together.  A self proclaimed egotist, arrogant, asshole.  (I start with quality, what can I say)  

What Happened:

I thought we were good up until 2 years ago when his job got super demanding and I thought that was the cause of the distance I was feeling.  A year ago, he made it clear that I wasn’t his ideal for a life partner, but didn’t actually break up.  I then made it my goal to work on the relationship to make it work damnit.  He tried to end it after the holidays, but I told him no and gave a logical argument.  He lied and said he wanted to work on it.  Then on November 6th we had another flat conversation where he finally ended it.  

What Now?

I now have to leave my home of 7 years.  I have to untangle a household that has been blended like a married couple, but none of the fringe benefits of a divorce.  None of the setbacks either.  i have to find a new home and relocate me and my cat on a limited budget.

So now I will log my ups and more downs.  How I will get through this tough time in my life.  I would love this to turn into a romantic comedy where I get the guy in the end, but I am very aware that will not happen.  I cannot at this point grant him the satisfaction, even if he came back on hands and knees with a ring that made the Hope Diamond look shabby.  This journal will be my log of how I will not become something pathetic and someone to feel sorry for.  This will become a log of my success in rediscovery of myself and how to be my own person again without identifying myself as half of a couple.  

I hope this helps someone else out there who feels adrift, lost, and hopeless.  I want people to know that even though this chapter ends and it is painful, that it is not the end of the story.  Make a new one of your own and write your own ending.